The Modern Baby Shower: Why Nesting Parties Are Taking Over

Avoid the hassle of having a friend organize a baby shower and host a nesting party yourself!

An increasingly popular alternative to traditional baby showers, a nesting party is organized by moms (or sometimes dads!) to prepare for a baby. The idea comes from the motherly instinct to “nest” before the infant’s arrival. Nesting often includes cleaning (sometimes obscure places, haha!), organizing, or cooking. 

During nesting parties, guests take a load off of mom’s shoulders by helping her organize her nursery, cook freezer meals, stock up on baby and/or postpartum essentials, or declutter her space. It’s also a great way to help mama out if she is a second-time or even fifth-time mom! 

What Is a nesting party?

Much more casual than a typical baby shower, nesting parties are becoming more popular among new parents. They are far less expensive, require less organization and prep, and typically involve just close friends and family.

Guests visit the expectant parents living space and help mom check off her nesting “to-do” list. This usually involves deep cleaning, setting up the baby’s nursery, or preparing make-ahead meals for the fourth trimester. 

Typical tasks for guests to help with at a nesting party

• Setting up baby’s nursery (crib, bassinet, wall art, changing table).
• Washing and sorting baby clothes by month. 
• Setting up a “postpartum cart” for mom with pads, postpartum underwear, nipple cream, snacks, and Ibuprofen.
• Preparing freezer meals.
• Deep cleaning (bathroom, kitchen, living room)
• Stocking up on essential baby items (diapers, Aquaphor, baby wipes, burp clothes).
• Decluttering pantry, household items, clothes, kitchen cabinets, closets.
• Sanitizing baby bottles.
• Set up baby monitors and sound machines.
• Assembling strollers and car seats.

Why host a nesting party instead of a baby shower? 

1. The overwhelming amount of baby gifts you need to find space for

Receiving baby gifts from friends (sometimes that you haven’t spoken to in years!) is such a generous gesture. However, most first-time moms (myself included!) can be so overwhelmed by the new baby items. How do you use them? When do you use them? And most importantly, where the heck do you put them? 

I was in a one-bedroom apartment with my first baby, and the accruing gifts got anxiety-inducing really fast. I eventually got it all organized, but having a nesting party would have been a lifesaver. 

2. The stress of organizing an elaborate baby shower

Let’s face it: being pregnant and enduring additional unnecessary stress is a terrible combination. Baby showers are typically a more formal event that requires extensive planning, communicating with the host, a longer guest list, baby shower games, a cute theme, and sufficient event space or home. A baby shower is mostly celebratory, while a nesting party immediately contributes to preparing for the new baby. 

Having close friends and family over to help unbox gifts, sort them by age and category, and figure out storage solutions for small spaces is an amazing alternative. Guests could also give advice from their own parenting experiences, birth stories, and how to survive the newborn stage. 

3. Less pressure and a more casual atmosphere

A nesting party is far more relaxed and with an informal environment. A smaller guest list with close family and friends removes pressure and makes for a more intimate, successful gathering. 

4. Practical help with baby prep.

A hands-on event like a nesting party helps relieve moms by preparing their space for life with a baby. No more stress on how to assemble the bassinet or arrange furniture in the nursery, you have a team of friends pitching in. 

5. Perfect for baby #2 (or 5!)

Baby showers are usually planned only for the first baby, leaving second-time (or third-time) moms without the same amount of help. A nesting party is a great way to celebrate every pregnancy and support mom, especially when she needs it the most. 

Planning a Nesting Party

• Pick a date. Choose a day and time that works for you. Not too early on in the pregnancy, but not too close to the due date. Typically, the start of the third trimester, or 28-34 weeks, is the perfect time for the nesting energy to start kicking in.
• Write down a to-do list. Organize the to-do list into categories such as organizing, cooking, cleaning, or decluttering. From there, write down specific tasks into each category, i.e., “prepare fettuccine alfredo freezer meal,” etc. Scroll down for an example to-do list with categories. 
• Build the guest list: Invite close friends and family members that you feel comfortable with. It can honestly be just family if that’s what works for you!
• Assign guests to specific tasks. For a smoother process, email the tasks ahead of time and assign guests to specific projects like meal prepping, laundry, organizing baby items, etc. 
• Ask guests to bring supplies: Any cleaning supplies, storage bins, and baby essentials. Write down a list of items you will need for the nesting party. Don’t be afraid to ask a mom friend for help! She will most likely know what you will need help with. 
• Food and refreshments: Provide snacks and drinks, and ask guests to bring food too for a potluck-style meal. 

Tips for Success

• Ask a mom for help. You don’t need to plan this all yourself. Take a mom friend (or your mom!) out for coffee and brainstorm ideas and tasks. 
• Avoid inviting too large of a crowd. It will be much easier to assign tasks to a smaller group of people, plus you will be much more comfortable and less stressed. 

• Be realistic about tasks. They didn’t build Rome in a day. Keep the to-do’s at a modest number and focus on the big picture. For example, setting up the bedside bassinet versus organizing the pantry. 
• Allow flexibility. Some guests may prefer some tasks to others. It’s not necessary to stick to your assigned tasks; just use it as a guide. 
• Say thank you. Don’t forget to send a thank you card with notes after the party. It is a small gesture that shows your appreciation to guests. 

Example To-Do List With Categories

Freezer Meals & Snacks

• Lasagna
• Breakfast sandwiches/burritos
• Chicken tinga
• Chicken fettuccine alfredo
• Enchiladas
• Chicken noodle soup
• Lactation bars and/or cookies

Organizing Baby Items

• Organize baby clothes by size and put them away. 
• Set up diapers, wipes, and creams by the changing table, as well as a portable changing pad.
• Declutter closet, kitchen cabinets, living room, bedroom, etc., to make space for baby items. 

Baby Furniture Set Up

• Assemble the bassinet, stroller, bouncer, and changing table. 
• Move other furniture as necessary to make space. 
• Install the car seat.

Deep Cleaning

• Clean the nursery area or bedroom.
• Sanitize bottles and pump parts if necessary.
• Clean any second-hand baby items. 
• Wash baby clothes, bedding, and blankets with free and clear detergent.

Stocking Up on Essentials

• Create a “diaper station” with diapers, wipes, and creams in the bedroom, living room, and nursery. 
• Make sure mom is stocked up on postpartum recovery stuff(pads, cooling packs, nursing bras).
• Make a postpartum/nursing cart with essentials like pads, postpartum underwear, breast pump, nursing pads, burp cloths, water, and snacks.

Whether you’re a first-time mom or a seasoned mama of four, a nesting party is the best way to prepare for the arrival of your little one. Take this guide and tips to throw a stress-free, productive, casual party that is way better than a baby shower IMO!